Monday, May 12, 2008

Tulips up

The evidence is in. Spring has arrived at last. It's a couple weeks late this year, but the tulips are up, the flowering trees in bloom, the garden centers are crowded, and the grass has to be mowed three times a week.
Posted by Tom Casady at 5:33 AM

13 comments:

Anonymous said...

This seemed like a non-LE type of post - until I clicked on the links. I think you've got a pretty good dental plan, so your undercover officers likely have to blacken a few teeth to get the realistic "meth-mouthed hooker" look.

On a related note, I'm sure you've noticed that the only place you see healthy-looking prosties is on inane TV crime dramas. Why? Because it's awfully hard to titillate men and boys in the TV audience with realistic-looking ones. Show them a realistic facsimile thereof, and they'll go "UGH!" as they change the channel for better T&A .

Crack, meth, and being knocked around a lot (don't forget the likelihood of being HIV-positive for years) won't make you look like a pretty young actress.

May 12, 2008 at 6:25 AM
Anonymous said...

Oops, my error, here is a correct meth-mouth link. I hope people remember those pretty pictures if they ever think about using that nasty stuff.

May 12, 2008 at 6:35 AM
Anonymous said...

I read the newspaper article and it looks like all the "johns" are foreigners.. Is it harder for arabs to get a date in lincoln,ne ? I'd like to see a pie chart on that chief....

May 12, 2008 at 6:40 AM
Anonymous said...

I needed a good Monday laugh.Anonymous May 12, 2008 6:25 AM did a great job.
bbrk

May 12, 2008 at 7:00 AM
Tom Casady said...

6:40 AM-

I've got your pie chart.

May 12, 2008 at 7:33 AM
Anonymous said...

Now that is what I call itsah all in howz ya look at it

May 12, 2008 at 7:50 AM
Chris said...

Three times a week? What're you feeding your lawn Chief?

May 12, 2008 at 8:36 AM
Anonymous said...

My breakfast toast seems a little dry this morning...

May 12, 2008 at 8:41 AM
Anonymous said...

You cops are funny! Anyway, be sure to tell the people who complain about their neighbors not sweepting the mowed grass off their sidewalks, "Better grass than prostitues, sir."

May 12, 2008 at 9:16 AM
Anonymous said...

Just because there haven't been any pirate references lately, it's the Pirate Keyboard

May 12, 2008 at 9:48 AM
Anonymous said...

TO ALL OFFICERS:

I hope you all have a good National Police Week!

jenn

May 12, 2008 at 10:13 AM
Anonymous said...

COPIAGUE, N.Y. (AP)—A Long Island man who flipped his finger at a police cruiser and then popped a wheelie on his motorcycle is recovering from injuries after crashing.

Doctors say the man will require an experimental dignity transplant, and that his pride remains in critical condition.

ha ha lol

May 13, 2008 at 4:13 AM
Tom Casady said...

9:48-

Alright, alright. I didn't want to encourage any more of the pirate posts, but the keyboard just cracked me up!

4:13-

So, Citizens Against Pornography is picketing the Applause Video store at 11th and O Streets, in about 1984. It's a nice bunch of folks in sandals and natural-fibers. I'm on crowd control. Talk about an easy job--they brought cookies to share.

A couple of Jaspers driving by westbound on O Street lean out the window jeering and gesticulating. Wham! They rear-end the vehicle stopped in front of them. It was a big collison, and they were now disabled on the busiest street in town with steam pouring out of the fractured radiator, to the great amusement of the polite protestors. They got no cookies.

May 13, 2008 at 5:55 AM

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