Tuesday, March 17, 2009

The weekend in police reports

Haven’t done this in a while (lightly edited to protect identities, click images to enlarge):

Hydraulic, and with flames!


The morning after


Ranch style



New York style



…or are you just happy to see me?



11 comments:

Anonymous said...

There was that one shoplifting the other day, where she also lifted an EPT kit - then took it in the store's bathroom and used it. I guess she must have really needed to know, and right this minute. I don't know if they actually caught her, or just found the test remnants. The big question: Was she or wasn't she?

Tom Casady said...

6:13-

That detail was not recorded in the investigative report.

Anonymous said...

Haha, 'This is how we do it in New York'

Anonymous said...

Maybe, if one can't afford to buy their own EPT kits, perhaps they shouldn't be doing things that would leave them to have use of one in the first place.

I shake my head at some of the things that are boosted. String cheese (bleh) seems popular, as do certain kinds of hair care products. Hard liquor, that essential food group, also seems to be a perennial big hit. None of that bargain hooch, either. Premium brands (Grey Goose, The Glenlivet, etc) are all the rage with many shoplifters. I guess if you're going to steal, then steal the best.

Grundle King said...

I signed up for the crime mapping awhile back, and received the crime report for that breakfast/pregnancy test incident and proceed to laugh heartily. I kinda figured the conversation would go something like this...

"Hey sweetie, I made breakfast in bed for you...Oh, by the way, I'm also pregnant!"

Anonymous said...

What is:

Is that a can of Red Bull in your pocket,...?

Anonymous said...

Chief,
How do you/law enforcement officers feel about employees restraining shoplifters? At the retail store I worked at, we were told not to, yet I see it happen at some establishments.

Anonymous said...

I like the one I saw a few weeks back the guy got his McDonalds burger stolen from him.

Anonymous said...

@10:41

I don't think some lost merchandise is worth getting hurt over.

Cedric Satterfield said...

In the stores where I have worked LP I was the only one authorized to restrain, and that depended on the store. WM wouldn't authorize physical restraint, favoring calling the appropriate authorities while I would supply the information for the investigative report if they managed to leave. If they were still on the property I would page to have a manager take them to another part of the store, but if they forcibly made an attempt to leave no effort would be made to restrain them.

Cedric Satterfield said...

Caveat-that was also several years ago when I was in college and relatively young and full of P and V. Their policy(s) may have changed considerably since then.